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Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer

Opinions by Griffin Wright

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With recent controversy being stirred up about Ted Cruz, a fact that has been staring everyone in the face plainly is that Cruz is not who he appears to be. I can say with complete confidence that Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer.

There is evidence all around us; all you have to do it look. The first and probably the most convincing piece of evidence is that Cruz implied that he was the Zodiac Killer in 2013. One viewer titled his speech “This Is The Zodiac Speaking”. Viewers and supporters laughed it off as a joke, but in reality it was the murderous Cruz confessing on national television that he was the Zodiac Killer.

Further evidence that indicates that Cruz is the Zodiac Killer is that he has no alibi for the time and date of the killer’s murders. Cruz and the Zodiac Killer have never been seen in the same room together. If Cruz and the Zodiac Killer were in the same room, the public would know that he is not the killer. But they have never been seen together indicating that Cruz could be the Zodiac Killer.

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Ted Cruz’s campaign logo can easily be arranged to prove he is the zodiac killer.


More compelling is the similarities one can see when they take a step back and look at a side by side photo Cruz and the Zodiac Killer as a whole. The last name Cruz has a C and a Z in it. Do you know what else has a z and a c in in it? EXACTLY; ZODIAC HAS A Z AND C IN IT. The evidence is clear; all that has to be done is string in together.

Cruz-Zodiac

The two pictures look practically the same. This is further evidence indicating the relationship between Cruz and the Zodiac Killer.

It is a known assumption that children are afraid of killers. Children are also afraid of Cruz, as can be seen in this video. In the video you can see the mortal fear that Cruz’s daughter has of him and her complete opposition to her father kissing her. Ted Cruz’s own daughter is afraid of him, and kids are afraid of murderers. This is direct evidence that Cruz is a killer, the Zodiac Killer.

More evidence that indicates that Cruz is the Zodiac Killer is that if you go to http://whoisthezodiackiller.com, it redirects you to the Ted Cruz campaigne website. This is undoubtedly a breadcrumb left by Cruz, the Zodiac Killer, to lead us to the truth. I am not the only one who has seen past the charade. According to upi.com, a poll showed that 38% of Florida voters belive that Cruz could be the Zodiac Killer. Even students here at Waukee High School believe that Cruz may be the mysterious killer that has never been caught. When senior Mason Statton was asked, he said Ted Cruz is “absolutely” the Zodiac Killer. There is overwhelming support that Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer. 

If you look into the eyes of Ted Cruz you can see the bloodlust. He even showed his evil murdery intent in an interview where he states, “If I were in my car and getting ready to reverse and saw Donald [Trump] in the backup camera, I’m not confident which pedal I’d push.” To me, this is the final piece of evidence that concludes that Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer. The public needs to wake up and see the truth.

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Pure Bloodlust

 

Not all of us at the Waukee Arrowhead believe that Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer. This is purely opinionated by Griffin Wright.

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1 Comment

One Response to “Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer”

  1. Your future president Ted Cruz on April 13th, 2016 11:46 AM

    What an interesting SATIRICAL article! But I think you should stick with real world stuff. It would be a real shame if a talented writer such as yourself disappeared.
    Xoxo,
    teddy

    [Reply]

If you want a picture to show with your comment, go get a gravatar.




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Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer